What Brings Clarity

“Kindness in words creates confidence. Kindness in thinking creates profoundness. Kindness in giving creates love.”                                                                                          -Lao Tzu

We have gone on a journey this past year, through Body Presencing™, learning what it is, seeing what keeps us stuck in the past, learning what it is to be in the present, and seeing what is in store for us in the future. Along with stories, cases, and philosophizing, I have included many exercises and meditations to help us along this path. Here we are at the end of the year, and I don’t know about you, but this year has gone by very fast. At times it felt slow, like through our cold, sludgy winter, but other times just zoomed past. This is life; sometimes we get stuck in something and time goes very slowly, our growth seems to slow down. At times, we pick up things very quickly and just roll with our learning. One of the biggest things that helps us create a new future gives u…

What Happens When We Jump Ahead Or Go Back Into The Future?

“Piglet noticed that even though he had a very small heart, it could hold a rather large amount of gratitude.”        A.A. Milne
Cool grey days are upon us with the harbinger of winter. I don’t know about you, but I am an outdoor girl. I love being outside…when it isn’t too cold or wet. So as the days are shorter and cooler I tend to pull inward and to read more and write more. With this more sedentary and indoor lifestyle I also plan more and visualize what is to come and what I am working towards. As we do this there is a warning also. Visualizing and planning have their merits, and we need to be careful not to jump ahead and start going through elaborate and not so elaborate fantasies and imagining of how things are going to be. There is a fine and important line between imagining and brainstorming and visualizing and jumping into the future based more on dreams and the unconscious than on conscious planning which also allows the unconscious to move within us. 
So what happens when …

How Does Your Family Influence You?

“Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.”                                                                                                   -Epicurus

At this time of year our families become more fully on our minds. The days are shorter and cooler, we begin to spend more time in doors, and we begin to think of holidays coming up which have large family connotations like Thanksgiving, and then Chanukah and Christmas are on its heels. As I am greatly influenced and inspired by nature, I become fully aware of the smell of falling wet leaves and the silhouettes of trees making their reappearance.
When I was a child, I dreaded this time of year as I would be more engaged with my family and for me, this wasn’t a good feeling. I looked for ways to get out of the house and get involved in outside activities. Through my work of Body Presencing, I have learned to, and I help others to gracefully move, i…

How Does Hope Help?

“True forgiveness is when you can say, thank you for the experience.”                                                                                              -Oprah Winfrey
Hope can be a wonderful emotion to feel. We all need hope. In November, hope can be especially helpful. It can be difficult to be close to a family celebration when so much is unresolved in us with our families, and when our family experiences have been very difficult. We also get filled with “shoulds” during this time. It could go something like this, “I don’t want to go but I should go.” Or, it could go like this, “I don’t want to invite them but I feel I should.” Having hope helps us get through times like this. “I hope all goes well, or that so and so is kind to me, or I don’t get triggered, or so and so doesn’t get triggered, etc.”
When we are little, hope helps us get through very difficult times. Hope is a great help. We need hope sometimes to just carry on and survive. When we feel alone and when we iso…

Grateful For Life

"Let us be grateful to the people who make us happy; they are the  charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.”                                                                                          -Marcel Proust
Come November, we often think of Thanksgiving and what we are grateful for. It is alright not to be grateful for all the things we think we should be. It is even better to let us feel our gratefulness in all the places that it naturally rises. As I am going through my BodyPresencing hologram, November and December of this year focuses on being able to move gracefully into the future. Time is fluid and as we affect our past, we influence our present and our future. So, as we work to heal aspects of our past and our ancestors unresolved secrets, we also heal through time.
At this time, my older dog is asking for help to end her pain. This means putting her to sleep as gracefully as possible. We have a young dog who loves her deeply as well as two humans who live with her…

What Is Your Personal Shift

Maybe the only thing each of us can see is our shadow.                                                                                                           Carl Jung
October is a time in the year with a big seasonal shift. We are shifting from the heat and sun of summer to the cold and darker hibernation of winter. Even though this shift happens as part of our natural rhythm in life, it sometimes is hard to accept.
There are many things in life which are hard to accept. Who doesn’t wish that we had a great childhood, great parents, and a happy life? Events in life happen. Patterns get repeated. We all know the saying, “s… happens.” A friend of mine likes to say, “Shift happens”. I also like to say, “shift your story, and shift your life”. It is bad enough that bad things happen to us. It is even worse that we keep repeating them in our lives. We keep repeating sayings and beliefs, we keep repeating words, and we keep repeating our family and life stories. These stories then get …

The Language of the Shadow

I have a little shadow that goes in and out with me; and what can be the use of him is more than I can see.                                                                                  -Robert Louis Stevenson

We all want to create a future for ourselves and our families and our communities where we can live fulfilled lives with happiness and prosperity. We want to live connected to others and yet independent. This is our true inheritance. So often this is not the future we do create.
We often live in the shadow of our unconscious and compelled to make similar mistakes as our parents, and their parents, and so the patterns we see that keep repeating, keep repeating.
Our shadow side controls us until we can make conscious what has been hidden from us. As October rolls around each year, I am so much more aware of the colder, darker sides of us as the shorter and cooler days make their appearance. Even so, there is so much beauty in the month of October, just as there is inside of us. 

A Future of Love

“Beware lest you lose the substance by grasping at the shadow.”                                                                                                     -Aesop
As the month of October unfolds, the leaves turn bright colors, the sun casts shadows at a different angle, and the weather cools. I see oranges, and reds and yellows everywhere. People get very creative in carving their pumpkins. There is a kind of excitement in the air; of change. As I watch the changes unfolding from my morning window, I think of us as people, and what we want for our future and our children’s future.  As I am sitting and contemplating, a client I recently worked with comes to mind because she too was concerned about her future and her son’s future.
She came in “worked up” about a recent incident. She was parked outside a client’s house while she spent an hour with her. She came back to her car and found a parking ticket on her windshield, and so went immediately to pay for it because there is a wind…

Our Inner Halloween

How can I be substantial if I do not cast a shadow? I must have a dark side if I am to be whole.                                                                                                    -Carl Jung

Halloween has become a big celebration here in America. When I was small, it was a little fun celebration mostly for kids. We would go out in our costumes; angels, princesses, princes, hobos, etc. and play a game called, “trick or treat”. We would knock on doors in our neighborhood, say “trick or treat”, and they would ask for a trick or a joke, and then give out home made treats or candy. It was fun, and not really so scary. These days, adults celebrate as much or more than the children. The children wear many scary costumes in addition to the fairy princesses, etc. Among other Halloween differences, people don’t have a joke or trick ready, and they love to scare each other. They even carve very intricate, scary faces on their pumpkins.  We all have an inner Halloween; a part of …

What Do You Do When Things Don't Go Your Way?

“Everyone things of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.” Leo Tolstoy
Here we are in the dog days of summer, September. We are thinking and planning ahead to the coming fall and winter. We may prefer warm weather, but we live in a temperate climate. We dream of where we want to live, what we want to happen, etc. 
We dream and life happens. We would love to control our lives and be in control and yet there is a bigger picture. So often what we think we want and what we really want, underneath, aren’t the same things. We live our lives as if we are in control and as if we really know what is best for us, and we complain when things don’t go our way. There are days and times when we get behind every slow going car, we catch every red light, we drop things, we trip and fall and hurt ourselves, we get way laid by things we don’t want to do and we have to do, etc. It is so easy to just get upset when things don’t go the way we would like them to go. We can lash out, get a…

Does Anger Linger

“The world as we have created it is a process of our thinking. It cannot be changed without changing our thinking.”                                                                                                           -Einstein
This September time of year can be hot, and can be cool as a harbinger of the fall nipping on its heels. It is a time of the New Year in the Jewish calendar, and a time of “at one ment”, atonement, for the Jewish Yom Kippur. It is a time when we go apple picking and blackberry picking at the local orchards, and enjoy fresh apple pies and apple cider. And it is a time of year which starts to bring out our cool, shadow sides. I never thought I had much anger left in my cool side, but I am discovering there is still some lingering.
With the swings of temperature and bridge to a new season of the year, and the intent and preparation for the Jewish holidays, it makes me draw inward a bit in readiness and in pursuit of self growth. As I do so, I think about the part…