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Showing posts from November, 2015

What Our Future Holds

"Even if you fall on your face, you are still moving forward." -Victor Kiam
This has been quite a year. I have written about my father with inspirational stories, with what I have learned about myself, my family, and from my patients. It has been a year of weaving my life and stories and learning with that of my father and a memorial of sorts to him. We all have family stories and beliefs, events, thoughts, and memories that have shaped us. If felt important to me to bring this together for my learning and to share what I have learned with you. As this year is nearing completion, what does the future hold? That is a question we can all ask ourselves as the new year is approaching; what does the future hold?
This  has been a year of talking a lot about family, our parents, and their influence on us. It has been a year of talking about interrupted bonds between us and our caretakers, talking about truth and grief and mourning, talking about aging and the winter of our lives, maki…

Blast From The Past

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"Most people think that shadows follow, precede, or surround beings or objects. The truth is that they also surround words, ideas, desires, deeds, impulses, and memories.” -Elie Wiesel

These days many of us use the social media of Facebook to find and re-connect with old friends and/or school acquaintances of the past. This can be quite fun and bring back many old memories we haven’t thought of in a long time. As I am coming to the end of this year, 2015, in my attempt to honor my father’s life in a true way, I am intrigued with the memories that are surfacing for me. It is through these old memories, blasts from the past, that we can also gain greater insights into ourselves. We can use these to see old patterns of our parents, our grandparents if we know them or hear stories of them, and ourselves. Seeing the patterns helps us to bring consciousness to them for us and then to make different choices in our lives.
Through my work, I love to continue to learn for myself and also to he…

Memories

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"No memory is ever alone; at the end of a trail of memories, a dozen trails that each have their own associations.” -Louis L”Amour
Memories are interesting things. They can be elusive and we can make them intractable by constantly repeating them to ourselves and others. They can also be beautiful tools to help understand ourselves, and rarely are they factual or objective. Our memories tell us about our perspective of people, things, and events. We can get many people in a room and have them talk about their memories of the same event, and everyone will remember it differently.
With my father, he loved to repeat stories over and over again, and they become unchangeable in his mind. This happens with all of us. Yet these memories or stories help us to understand us and others. What we remember, how we remember, the words said that we remember, and our reactions to our story help us to understand our unconscious. I love it when I facilitate constellations for others in a workshop setti…

Sunday Mornings

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"Memories of our lives, of our works and our deeds will continue in others.” -Rosa Parks
What do you do on Sunday mornings? I bet most of you have a Sunday morning ritual. Some of my best memories of my father reside with Sunday mornings. If you have been following my blogs for the year, I have been writing a memoir of my father, what I have learned from him, how it pertains to what I learn with my patients, and family stories and tools to help us to live fuller, whole and vital lives. Even to this day my Sundays are influenced by him in a good way. I have written about some of my negative learning experiences, and this is a positive one.
Sundays were a more leisure day which began with a morning adventure and then a breakfast outing. He worked a lot and was very available for his patients, and Sunday mornings felt like our time; me and dad sometimes, and often, me and the family except for our mother. Sunday mornings dad gave her a gift of sleeping in until we were older and she ch…