“When you do things from your soul,
you feel a river moving in you, a joy.”
Today was a beautiful spring day, full of light winds, people flying kites, playing baseball, and mowing their lawns. I had an opportunity to sit outside in the sun, just being and thinking; feeling the sun on my skin and the wind in my hair. I felt alive and carefree.
I see many people in my practice who are so driven by their inner voices that control them unconsciously that they don’t allow for much fun. Some people consider fun juvenile or a waste of time. Then there are the people who surround themselves with drama or think that partying and drinking is “adult fun.” What is the difference between true fun and joy and forced fun?
One of the things I do with my clients is look at their belief systems: where they come from, who in their family carries these beliefs, and if they truly match their authentic selves; separate from their family, community, church, etc. It is amazing how difficult an exercise this is and how resistant many of us are to looking at our beliefs.
One lady I was teaching said that in her family, in order to be part of the family, she has to carry the same feelings as everyone else. All the while also having to hide those feelings and pretend that she is feeling just fine, thank you very much. In her family, there isn’t much room for being happy and joyful or just having plain fun. They have to suffer and then have to pretend they are not suffering.
Another woman I work with does just the opposite. For her, it is important to go out clubbing and drinking many nights in order to get away from her pain. She thinks she is having fun and being joyful. In actuality she is trying very hard to be happy and joyful by doing the opposite of what her family does; this way she thinks she is not being influenced by them and their beliefs. When we have to work so hard for something, is that really having fun? The more we try to be different from our families without understanding ourselves, the more we are really just like them. When we really don’t appreciate ourselves, or we run from our feelings, or we are controlled by blind rules that aren’t ours, we limit our ability to experience pure joy and fun.
True fun and joy are often spontaneous and bring us a sense of freedom. It involves knowing we are separate from and yet connected to our families. “Adult fun” is the ability to allow ourselves to be freely and joyfully who we actually are. We might be goofy, we might love to laugh, or we might be serious and love to see funny movies. True fun comes from enjoying who we are and following the still small whisper that invites us into joy each and every day.
Healthy and Fun Eating and Lifestyle Tips
In the spirit of fun, here is a recipe that I have fun making and enjoy eating; especially in the Spring.
2and ½ cups of flour: mix half and half garbanzo been flour and rice flour.
½ cup of stevia or xylitol
½ cup water
1 teaspoon baking powder and 1 teaspoon baking soda
½ teaspoon sea salt
½ cup butter
Mix the slightly warmed butter with the sugar. Add the flour mixture and the water. Beat in the egg.
Warm the oven to 350. Drop by large tablespoons onto an ungreased cookie sheet and bake for 20 minutes
Meanwhile wash and slice a quart of strawberries. Yes, it is the season! If you want, slightly sweeten the strawberries, although I think they are sweet enough without added sugar. Slice the biscuits in half and put a large dollop of strawberries on the biscuit. If you would like to add coconut milk cream on top, or ice cream, feel free and indulge!
I do make up my own recipes, and I encourage you to do the same if you are so inclined. That is part of my fun!